The Well-Tempered Chocolatier

Sometimes I feel like an animal at the zoo, or maybe the aquarium, in that I have to bribe myself to do things. This is particularly pronounced on beautiful sunny days when I’d rather be running around outside, but am sitting inside staring woefully at a computer screen.

You know how you can train a dolphin to do flips in exchange for, I don’t know, sardines? Way back when, I trained myself to work by rationing out bits of chocolate at set times. During university, I ate an M&M every time I finished reading a page. Sometimes when I was feeling crazy, I’d switch to peanut M&Ms, or – gasp! – Skittles.

Clearly, the grown-up equivalent is to bribe myself with nice chocolate.

It’s tricky, though. I have piles of beautiful artisan chocolate that might as well have been made by the hands of blue-haired pixies, and it seems like such a shame to “waste” it by using it as an absent-minded chocolate bribe. I tried buying high-end grocery store chocolate, thinking it would be okay…and sadly, it isn’t. I’ve ruined myself. It all tastes like wax and sugar to me.

It’s gummy bears and jelly beans from here on out.